We may have been staying at a hippy hostel for two weeks but it wasn't until I found a scorpion in my backpack while getting dressed that I felt truly 'awakened'.
It all happened early one morning in San Pedro, Lago Atitlan when I reached for a black singlet and I saw something move. At first I assumed I had seen nothing but when I reached back in to retrieve the top, a fiery and ferocious scorpion reared it's poisonous tail at me, threatening to stab me with his sharp pincer...
Thankfully having lived in Australia for the best part of 29 years, I'm used to things that can kill me. For those of you who don't know what to do when standing off with a scorpion, follow these simple steps to ensure your safety:
1. Scream LOUDLY for your boyfriend. If you don't have a boyfriend it is still acceptable to scream.
2. If there is a bed or chair available, now is the opportune moment to jump up and do a Tom Cruise on Oprah's sofa putting as much distance as possible between you and the menacing pincer. If you don't have a chair or bed cling to the ceiling like a cat using your finger and toe nails.
3. Douse the entire room and all your belongings in kero, light your Cuban cigar like a boss and toss the match over your shoulder as you exit the room...Wollah! No more scorpion!
Alternatively you could do what Justin did and just take the shirt outside, and shake the scorpion off into the cornfield behind the hostel. He was slightly concerned that BBQ scorpion would break the 'no meat' rule at our vegetarian digs.
Now that you have rid yourself of the terrifying beast, it's time to contemplate how on earth it got into ones backpack in the first place. These are the most likely theories;
Theory #1: After having asked The laundry lady to re-weigh my clothes, she was offended by me and slipped him into my washing.
Theory #2: The laundry lady folded my clothes without shaking them out for critters, unknowingly sending him on a one way trip to the hostel
Theory #3: He heard how awesome my travels were and wanted to come along for the ride or
Theory #4: When I was walking back from Indians Nose and felt something land on my back, it was infact a 'drop scorpion' - similar to a drop bear - that landed in the hood of my jumper. When I took my jumper off on my return he crawled out of my hood and into my backpack, ready for the next adventure!
While the truth is out there, somewhere, we'll never know the truth.
Long live the scorpion!
Ever found yourself face to face with an unwanted hitch-hiker? Let us know what happened in the comments below.
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